The Fling Before The Ring

 Reason To Carry Cash Number 27: 

someplace's you don't want to explain when they show up on your bank account.

I am about to break a cardinal rule, one that normally if you were told you would then be killed.  

I am about to tell about what happened at a Bachelorette party.

Saturday was a little hectic - but by 3 that afternoon Vixen, Giggles, Red and I were headed north. We checked into the hotel and were joined shortly by Blondie, Vivi, Girl-Friend, and Queen (our gay guy friend). 

The hotel suite was WONDERFUL (thank you Vivi!) and after a few rounds of drinks started to get ready for the night ahead.

Let me backtrack a minute... my first great idea of the night came on the drive up as I saw a billboard for Racetrac.

"Let's get icee's and mix them with vodka!" I suggested. 

GREAT IDEA... at the time. So we stopped and three of the four of us went inside to purchase Strawberry-banana icee's  and then once back in the car I dug around in my bag and pulled out the bottle of Grey Goose I had brought for the nights festivities. Delicious! 

So as we got ready we all pre-gamed before leaving the hotel and heading for the first stop. We had chosen a hotel downtown so we could walk as many places as possible. For diner we had chosen a fabulous brewery and grill. Over diner the eight of us laughed and drank. It was here that I had the best Rum Runner I have possibly ever had in my life, but for $8.50 had better been good! It was my treat to myself before switching to  $1.50 beer - and what a treat it was!

From here we bar-hoped drinking beer along the way and finally landing a local joint that had an 80's cover band scheduled for the night.


We danced, sang at the top of our lungs, and stood right up front like star crazed groupies. Giggles was laughing and everyone seemed to be having a good time. 


Red and I headed for the bar to get another drink and I hear someone yell my name..... I stop as I hear my name yelled again. I turn around and scan the crowd when a man standing in front of me shouts, "E?"


"Yeah...." I reply trying to get a good look at the guy who in the dim light and with the baseball cap I do not recognize.


And then it hits me as I see a woman approach his side. It's Marine's aunt and uncle who have also made the two hour drive to see the band. 

Small world.


We talk a minute and laugh at the coincidence before I wave goodbye and Red and I join our group again.


At this point I admit I am drinking heavily. I know where our next stop is and have decided I will be less uptight if I'm a little tipsy.

Everyone knows where we are going but Giggles. We leave the club at exactly midnight and walk outside to hail a cab. The 8 of us pile into the death cab mini-van driven by a 23 year guy who is apparently training for Nascar. 


Or maybe he was driving fast because two of the drunk girls are hitting on him and Queen is yelling from the back, "So girls or guys!?"


"Girls," He answers as he punches the gas.

"Awe well if you change your mind." Queen laughs at his own joke and the rest of us hold on for dear life as we take a curve on two wheels.


I thank the Driver as we get out and ask if he will come get us later. He gives Vivi a card but I suspect there is no way in hell he is coming back for our wild group.


We walk toward the door, and Giggles shrieks at the surprise as we enter the Gay Bar. The drag show starts at 12:30 and we are just in time. Exactly as planned.


We head up a spiral staircase and take places around the balcony area to watch the show. A voice booms over the speakers and the show begins.


OH MY!!!


Thats really all I can say. 


This was a totally new experience for me. And an interesting one at that; and one that left me with many unanswered questions --- I am so naive!


But let me admit I was also impressed!


"Is that a guy or a girl?" I whisper to Vixen.


She laughs hysterically, "A guy..."


"Well I wish I could move my hips like that!"


"Uh, yeah me to!" She replies.


We watch in amazement, cheering as one leaves the floor and another one enters. 


After the show we hang around for a bit dancing and drinking. Then the bartender snubs Blondie. Blondie is one of those loud-mouthed girls that after few drinks doesn't back down from a confrontation. We see the steam escape her ears and grab her and head for the exit.


From here we hop in a cab, not the same cabbie, and headed back downtown. 


Some how we ran into some guys from earlier that had been trying to hit on Girl-Friend and we follow them into a nearby joint. Pool tables fill the center of the room and tables and chairs are spread around the outskirts. The place is packed with local college students. 


The mood is not as fast paced as what we are wanting. So Vivi, Giggles, Red and I stand at the top of the stairs waiting for Blondie and Girl Friend to say goodbye to their new friends and this guy comes up. He introduces his-self to all of us, we all are polite but it's obvious we are not looking to hook up here. As he starts to talk to me I politely raise my left hand up to push my hair behind my ear doing it slowly enough and obviously enough flashing him my engagement ring. Boy is drunk and the subtle hint does not work. Neither does the silent treatment he is now getting from the rest of the group. 


Poor dude.


Girlfriend and Blondie stumble over and with a "nice meeting you" called over the shoulder, we head down the stairs and out of the bar. 


Outside we snap a few pictures and then head back to the hotel on a foot. It's only a few blocks but the few blocks walk seem even shorter as our laughter rang threw the streets. 


Once in the room some sat up in the living area of the suite but it was nearly 4 a.m. and I'll admit my head was ringing. I stumbled into one of the bedrooms and changed into PJ's and crawled into bed. 


The suite had 2 bedrooms and the one I had chosen had two queen beds - which were quickly full of Giggles and myself in one and Vixen and Blondie in the other. Apparently we aren't as young as we once were. lol


The next morning my head still was ringing and I really just wanted to come home and climb back in bed. 


But we are group of eaters and headed to the City Diner for lunch before heading home.


Queen to Giggles, "So how you feeling?"

Giggles, "I'm not as over hung as I thought I would be."

[Scene: Monica's apartment, where Phoebe's bachelorette party is taking place.]

Phoebe: (to Rachel) Thank you so much for this.

Rachel: Oh, d'you like it?

Phoebe: Oh my God, it's all so elegant! When's the dirty stuff starting?

Rachel: What?

Phoebe: You know, the strippers, and the guys dancing, and you know, pee-pee's flying about.

Rachel: Pheebs, I... there isn't gonna be any flying about! We actually thought we were a little too mature for stuff like that.

Phoebe: Oh, ok. I see what you're doing, that's fine. This is all there is, just tea, uh, ok. (she drinks her tea) Hmmmm... raunchy!

Rachel: Seriously Pheebs, it's not gonna be that kind of a party.

Phoebe: Really? So this is... this is my big send off in the married life? Rachel this is the only bachelorette party I'm ever gonna have! I've got a big wad of $1s in my purse! Really? I mean, really? It's just tea?

~ Friends ~