Adventures Of Starting Over

I am a eternal "what if" girl ~ as pointed out some time back by my friend Vivi.

What if I would have done this?

What if I had done that instead?

Now that I'm engaged I've had some people ask me if I was going to change the name of the blog... because I'm no longer a single girl and I am no longer starting over.

I have put some serious thought into it, but then I realized life is all about starting over.

Adventures in Starting Over.

If you think of life in terms of a book, there are many chapters; beginnings and ends. And inevitably you are always starting over at something.

Granted I am no longer a Single Girl starting over. The starting over part is like the advancement to the next chapter.

I am an engaged girl and going thru my first deployment. Learning the in's and out's of loving a Marine and the difficulty and greatness that comes from being in a military relationship.

When he returns we will start the next chapter in life by getting married.

I guess to make a long story short I'm keeping the name: Adventures of Starting Over. Because each day is a new beginning and the start of something fresh.

"It's not about the destination, it's about the ride."

Wordless Wednesday ~ Life is a Journey

Note To Self

Part of the Family

I find myself very fortunate in the fact that I really like Marine's family; and I am grateful that they seem to like me to.


Yesterday I attended a museum exhibit with Marine-Mom, Marine-Grandma, and Marine-Sister. An outing that had been planned for Marine-Mom's birthday. It was an exhibit that she had wanted to see about Princess Diana.

And I'll admit that Princess Di was a little before my time and this was probably not an exhibit I would have went to see.... but I was honored when the women of Marine's family invited me on this girls birthday trip. So of course how could I say no?

I ended up having a lot of fun. The exhibit was pretty impressive and I enjoyed spending the day with my future family.


After the exhibit we had diner at The Cheese Cake Factory.


WOW!!!


That is really all I can say. The food was wonderful but the desert was to good for words. I'm not a cheesecake person so I opted for the Black Out Cake. It was mouthwatering delicious.

With Marine gone I think it is great his family still includes me and keeps in touch. Which I also I do with them. This whole deployment think stinks - I'll be honest. But I am one to always try to find the good in every situation, and I believe that the cup is always half full. Deployment is helping me grow close to Marine's family and allowing them to really get to know me. There is no buffer.

Does that make sense? When you hang out with the family and you are with the significant other they perform as a buffer. The thing that you and the family have in common. If you don't know what to say, it's ok cause you have a partner to help you out. With that buffer removed you have to find other common ground, common interests or just plain topics for conversation.

But the downside is afterward you don't get the inside scoop of what they really think about you! lol

Overall it was a great trip and nice to be included as part of the family.

So what about your in laws or future in laws, etc --- Friend or foe?

Don't forget to enter my Giveaway!!! Click HERE

(Easy to enter ~ all you have to do is leave a comment saying hi!)

Sex And Spanx

So before I tell you about this weekend, I still need to tell you about last weekend.

Last Saturday I received a nice surprise.

Vivi was in my neck of the woods for a random lunch date. So of course I pretty much demand she see me while over here and then I proceed to nag her, text her, and basically do anything I can to get her to meet up with me after the date. Can you tell I've missed her?

She caved perhaps in fear that if she didn't I would not leave her alone. And she was probably right. :)

So she met me. I was at a Saddle Club Trade Day, so I had to take Horse home first before we could go out.

After exchanging my Ariets for tennis shoes we head to a local pub for diner and a beer. We sip our beers laughing and enjoying the food and conversation as we catch up on each others lives.

We are sitting at the bar and another girl I know is sitting to my right. She mentions that X was at the pub earlier.

I dismiss her comment. Saying no big deal. We get along, I would say hi if I ran into him.

Girl, "Wow thats really great. I don't know if I could be like that to any of my ex's."

Me, "Awe I'm happy that he and Physco-Bitch (yes this should be her name) are happy and I'm sure he feels the same about Marine and I. We're still on good terms."

"That's good cause their right down there." She points to the other end of the bar.

I stop my beer half way to my mouth. "What? He's here?"

Vivi's starts dying laughing, "Where? Where?" She spots them, "So does all that still apply?"

I blush a little, "yes it does."

We continue to eat. And I ignore the end of the bar where they are seated.

"I haven't been here for almost two damn years, and I'm in town one night..." Vivi laughs.

"Yeah gee thanks, I haven't seen him in about that long," I laugh.

I mean what else can you do but laugh?

We get up to leave. I have convinced myself that I will be the bigger person and that when we pass them, which we have to as we head towards the door, I will say hi - be polite and keep on walking.

As I walk I have my head sideways saying bye to the others at the bar. My head is turned and I am walking. I run smack dab into someone. I mean head hits chest - full blown run in.

I say sorry as I look forward...... and stare directly in the face of my X (he was headed to the bathroom). I literally just ran into him. Not exactly how I expected this whole "we can be friends thing to go".

I apologize say hi, how are you, and keep on walking.

Vivi is trying not to laugh as she to greets him.

You would think we could flee freely now but oh no. A guy friend and his girlfriend have come in and joined X and Physco-Bitch for diner. This guy friend jumps up and meets us. He says hi and then quickly starts talking to Vivi because he also has not seen her in forever. I am left standing there. Physco-Bitch shooting me daggers with her eyes.

I do the only thing I know how to do. I smile, say hi and try to make polite conversation.

Then as soon as Vivi escapes Guy friend we leave. And soon as we are out of sight burst into fits of giggles.

I love Vivi.

We proceed to go to a benefit for Blondie's aunt. Here we meet up with other friends.

This is followed by a late night trip to Waffle House. With three of our other friends and one of the friends mother's. Nothing like a late night trip to Waffle House where friends mother advises said friend how to keep Spanx from getting in the way of sex.

Yes, it did happen.

Friend, "Thank god I had on spanx otherwise I might have been drunk enough to have slept with him!"

Friends mom, "So how did the spanx stop you?"

Friend (so not wanting to have this conversation but has been thrown under the bus by another friend), "Because mother do you really think I could just whip them off right there? I mean hello dad was there!!"

Friends mom, "So? It wasn't like he was right there at your shoulder!"

Friend, "MOM!!"

Completely ignoring her, "You know what you need to do? Just cut you a whole in 'em. That way next time you won't have to worry about it."

She says this dead seriously.

"Oh my gosh!!" I laugh hysterically!

Friend Mom, "What?"

Other friend, " I can't believe you just said that."

Vivi is laughing so hard I think she is going to cry. Friend's face is so red it looks like a stop sign and me and other friend are just laughing.

Friend Mom, "Well I'm just trying to help her get laid!!"

Yes this over hash-browns is quite interesting.

Finally Vivi and I made it back to the house. Yep, I even talked her into staying the night. We had a late night pow-wow. It was great to catch up.

Each of my friends I love for different reasons. They are all special to me in different ways.

Vivi is my all around friend. The one I can cry with, laugh with, and anything else in between. Plus we always have fun!

I hope this summer we can have some more fun times.

So yeah all this happened in about a 6 hour time span. Definitely an interesting night.

Miranda, "Okay, I'm definitely in the slow sexual group if even Charlotte is open to this."

~ Sex and the City ~

Don't forget to enter my Giveaway!!! Click HERE

An Affair To..... Connect

So I am ashamed to admit it.... but I think I may be having an affair.

With my Blackberry.

It started out simple enough. But within just a few days quickly escalated into what can only be seen as a full fledged affair.

Since Marine's departure it never leaves my sight. If I walk out of room and realize I have left it I quickly stop what I'm doing to rush back and grab it.

Pathetic?

Yeah, just slightly.

But I don't want to miss a call.

I have gone so far even as to welcome it into my bed. It doesn't cuddle up to me and hold me tight, but instead sleeps next to my pillow. I think it understands my heart belongs to Marine and what we have is only a temporary fling.

Even though Blackberry won't admit it, I think he secretly likes all the new attention.

Ellie, "That's a pine cone, no matter how much you keep fondling it, it'll never take you to Cabo."

~ Cougar Town ~

---> Don't Forget to Enter The Giveaway <---

Wordless Wednesday ~ Care Package

Sent via BlackBerry by AT&T

I Don't Care About Your Band

I've always known that I'm naive. And I have faced the fact that I had a very sheltered childhood.

But wow.

I never realized how naive I really was till I started reading I Don't Care about Your Band, in which Julie Klausner tells: "What I've learned from Indie Rockers, Trust Funders, Felons, Faux Sensitive Hipsters, and other guys I've dated."

She talks about growing up and her first experiences with Adult magazines - I think she was in Middle School.

I was at least 18 when I saw my first Play Boy up close and personal. My best guy friend/ big brother figure was 22. Me and some girl friends were over at his house, as I was most summer days. Long story short; he was at work, we found it, flipped thru it and shared some giggles.

She goes on to tell about the guys from over the years; The lessons she learned and funny stories that relate.

Some stories make you laugh out loud, others made me question my own life and ponder again just how sheltered and innocent I possibly am. And I'll be honest some of the stories were so disgusting they made me want to gag. But for some reason no matter what happened I couldn't put the book down and walk away. I had to know what happened next.

She talks about the guys we all date or want to date. For example: The musician -" Crushing on musicians is a phase most straight girls go through, and some never get over."

Yep, been there done that.

Developed a crush on a guy just because he could play the guitar and sing. Without the guitar.... yeah not so much. But when he would pick up that guitar and begin to play I couldn't help but become memorized. It was just so darn sexy!

Needless to say we went on a date.

Without the guitar.

And the attraction just wasn't there. He was nice, said and did all the right things - but it was obvious to me he would always remain in the friend box. At the time I thought - what a shame. I mean who doesn't want a guy to write her love songs and play them before going to bed.

So now for the exciting part---- Are you ready?

I'm doing my first giveaway!!!!

One lucky reader will receive a free (FREE) copy of Julie Klausner's book. And the rest of you..... yeah your going to have to go out and buy it. But believe me, you'll be glad you did.

SO to enter the giveaway you must leave a comment on this post. Easy enough.

And if you so choose I would like you to tell me about someone you dated that fit into a stereotype category. You know what I mean everyones done it! - The jock, the musician, the guy who's questioning their sexuality..... you get the picture. This is not a requirement to enter, but I would love to hear your stories!!

I will run the contest till April 1st. (also if your an anonymous blogger and win thats ok! All information can be kept anonymous - contact me at lifeofasinglegirl@gmail.com for more details)

Thanks everybody! Good luck!

The Power of a Letter

Funny how a simple piece of mail can evoke such emotion.

Today I received my first letter from Marine!

I go to the post office daily, the postal employees know me by name - that is how many times a week they see me.

The letter is dated March 7th.

Even with the delay though I am just overjoyed to see his handwriting.

Up until first of last week we were able to chat occasionally (and briefly) on Facebook. But from here on out its old fashioned letters.

In a sense its romantic if you stop and think about it. Like the plot line from a classic movie. It makes me think about my Grandparents, and I wonder if during WWII my grandpa wrote to my grandma in much the same way. This is a question I wish I would have asked back when I had the chance. Hard to believe it's been nearly three months since he passed away. Still really doesn't seem real.

The letters remind me of days past when people actually wrote letters. Today with email and Facebook no one sends letters anymore. We expect news immediately. Who has time to wait for a letter?

I have time. That's all I have is time. For 7 months - it seems.

I am so happy to have received the letter. Who knew a piece of paper could bring so much joy?

In life I think you never really stop learning. Some lessons are obvious; others though seem to happen over time and you don't realize at the time that you are learning something until one day when you stop and think about it.

This experience has taught me so much. I am so much more appreciative now. I am more understanding. -- to name a few.

Having a bad day now doesn't seem so bad. If I'm having a bad day I always try to think about Marine and I know that no matter how bad my day is it can't be nearly as bad as his. I mean at least I have water to take a shower.

Funny how much a simple letter can make you realize.

Kathleen Kelly, [writing to "NY152"] Sometimes I wonder about my life. I lead a small life - well, valuable, but small - and sometimes I wonder, do I do it because I like it, or because I haven't been brave? So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book, when shouldn't it be the other way around? I don't really want an answer. I just want to send this cosmic question out into the void. So good night, dear void.

~ You've Got Mail ~

Friday Madness

This pretty much says it all:

Wordless Wednesday ~ The Easter Bunny goes Postal

Harley, a.k.a. The Easter Bunny, prepares an Easter Basket to send Marine in a Care Package.

Who Doesn't Love Post It Notes?

Ok check out Date Girl Diaries who I love for her cute Post it Note Tuesday ~ Post It Note Tuesday's is brought to you by:

And I mean really... who doesn't love post-it's?! I mean they cover my desk! So on a day that I'm to busy to post I'm slapping one on the blog as well!

Happy 101

On a rainy Sunday with not much to report I was thrilled to see that I had received an award! One that instantly made me want to get up and go make cupcakes, instead of the potato soup that I had on the stove cooking for diner..... hmmm nothing in the pantry to make the delicious looking desert.... but this week I may need to make a grocery store run to gather ingredients for scrumptious Cupcakes...

So now to the award rules.... yes every award seems to come with rules.

Award Rules:

1. Thank the Nominator.

Thank you Miss Esther from over at My LoveSweet Tooth ~ she is fairly new to the blogosphere but with her witty posts and delightful lovism's she has quickly made her way up my list of "Favorite Blogs to Read". Check her out, you won't be disappointed!

So thanks again Miss Esther for the yummy award and the few pounds I'm sure to gain from the cupcakes I am sure to make this week :)

2. List things that make you happy.

• Blogging (of course)
• Spending time with Marine
• Reading a great chick-lit, suspenseful "who dun-it" book
• Spending time with friends
• Riding my horse
• Long bubbles baths ~ with a good book
• Warm sunshine
• Driving with the sunroof open, warm sunshine streaming, and the radio up
• Barrel Racing
• Snowboarding
• Wakeboarding
• Eating Dr. Pepper and Chocolate Covered Pretzels

(there are so many more I could name but figured I should keep it short)

3. Tag some people who are amazing and happy, or should be happy, and contact them.

Date Girl ~ Date Girl Diaries

Phoebe ~ The Girl That Dreams

The Guys ~ The Guy's Perspective

Nicole ~ Breakfast At Walmart

Aurora ~ Cofessions Of a Cocktail Napkin

Thanks everybody for all your comments! I always enjoy reading them :) Hope your all having a great weekend!

Girl's Night

No matter what stage in life you are, you always need your friends. Guys need guy's nights just as much as girls need girl's nights.

For one thing they make keeping your sanity a whole hell of a lot easier.

Tonight some of us gathered for diner and a pitcher of beer.

Because let's face it gossip is just ssssooooo much better if beer is involved.

The text went out Wednesday: Blondie, "Girls night - Saturday 7 pm - Mexican Restaurant."

Simple. To the point. Just the way we like it.

Due to prior engagements or distance not everybody was able to attend, and our normally large group was narrowed down to just six; myself, Babbles, Nurse Betty, Hollywood, Blondie and Girlfriend.

Over diner and a pitcher of beer we caught up on news, gossip and everything else in between.

Some complained about work, some about the men in their life, and others about the lack of men in their life.

I just sat back and listened. For once not having a thing to complain about.

It was kinda nice.

"There is always one thing you should take out with you on a Saturday night... your friends."

~ Carrie, Sex & the City ~

The Singe Girls Bible ~ Cosmo

In high school my friends and I would buy magazines with headlines that read like a how to guide for men. "How to turn him on", "How to read his signals", "How to make him want you", etc. All titles screamed Coloring (For new readers learn the definition).

And all were magazines I would hide from my parents.

As I moved into my early 20's magazines such as Cosmopolitan, Glamour, and Marie Claire were the essentials of life. Sacred material that was the Bible for any young girl, not to mention your go to guide for just about anything.

As Marine and I stood in the Barnes & Noble magazine section Carrie Underwood caught my eye from the cover of the latest Cosmo. "How to touch a naked man" ~ reads the main headline in bold and under in a less eye catching font "16 naughty strokes that will send him over the edge".

Cosmo may be a women's magazine but it is all geared toward men. Or more specifically the things men want from women. From a woman's perspective of course.

Marine by this time has found the magazine he is looking for and turns to see what I've found.

"Oh la la," I flash the cover and grin.

He raises his eyebrows - either thinking I'm crazy or he may be in for some fun later - "Do we get to try that later?"

"Depends..... feeling lucky?"

He takes the magazine and makes his way to the check out where he puts it on the counter with his stuff and hands over his debit card.

Back at the lodge we are sitting on barstools at the tiny kitchen bar. Marine is surfing channels and I choose this as an appropriate time to flip open the magazine and study up.

He is engrossed in something on the History channel and I am mid-article when the silence is broken.

Marine, "What are you doing?"

Me, "Huh?"

He looks down at my hand.

I follow his eyes.

Down to where my index finger and thumb are in a position similar to what you would do if you're saying something is small.

"ummmm....." while reading the article I had been making the hand movements unconsciously.

My checks flush, "Nothing......." I reply in a sing song voice.

He scoots his stool closer. "So what does it say?"

As Marine peers over my shoulder I sum up each number: The T-Spot, The B-Spot, The F-Spot, and so on and so forth.

He laughs at a few, "Where do they come up with this stuff?"

I become slightly offended, I mean does he not know that Cosmo is the end all, know all of what men really want??!! How dare he question their accuracy.

I determined to show him that they know exactly what they are talking about memorize a few points to try on him later in the bedroom.

I won't give you the details but a few phrases that were mentioned to these new techniques:

• Whoa what are you doing?!
• No, no, no, no, no your going nowhere near there
• What is this supposed to make me feel again?

All intermixed with a lot (A LOT) of laughing.

My experiment was disheartening to say the least. How could Cosmo be wrong? It must be Marine. Maybe he's not normal. It could have been that I was doing it wrong, but let's face it I'm not going to take the blame. So it had to be him. Cosmo CANNOT be wrong.

**************************

Next morning picking up the magazine....

Marine, "What his text really mean..." he reads another cover head line. Turning to me, "You took advice from a magazine that tells you how to interpret text messages?"

I can't help but laugh. Maybe he has a point......

Keeping In Touch

I'm an overachiever.

It's my Virgo nature.

I have signed up for every military news site, news letter, discussion group and anything Marine you can think of.

Seriously.

I have a problem.

And with the nasty rainy day outside, way to much time on my hands.

Yes, I am blogging at work. Don't judge me, you know you do it to!

I stumbled upon a Military version of 20something bloggers --- so of course I had to join!

Visit True Military Wives Confessions

Anybody else reading this a member? Add me as a friend! Please..... pretty please....

And yes I know I'm not yet a wife, but soon enough. Let's not get technical. lol

Thru my searches though I have found so much helpful information! And I realized that I am way ahead of the game here. Maybe its just me or maybe it's due to my anal searches but I seem to know about all kinds of good things that others seem not to be aware of. Now I can't take the credit for all of this.... I got to give Marine some props. Because lets face it he can be just as OCD as me. That's why we're perfect for each other!!

He told me about this little jewel called MotoMail.

Ever heard of it?

Chances are probably not.

Well let me tell you about it ( like how I'm sneaking in my Thursday review?!).

To quote the MotoMail slogan:

"Family and friends of deployed Marines in Afghanistan & Iraq can NOW send a letter to be downloaded, printed, and ready for delivery, usually within 24 hours.THE SERVICE IS FREE, PRIVATE and SECURE."

So instead of writing a letter and waiting weeks for it to arrive to your Marine you can login the MotoMail website, type your letter, and normally within 24 hours it will be printed and on its way. No stamps, no long waits.

Fast, simple, easy. ------ Wow kinda sounded like I was describing a few girls I went to High School with there for a minute. ------ *Shake of head* Anyway moving on....

I tried it Tuesday just to give it a shot, see how it worked. I typed my letter and pressed send. Wednesday morning I received an email saying my letter had been printed and was out for delivery.

Now it all depends on where Marine is as to when he will get it. But still pretty cool.

I will still send old fashioned snail mail of course. Because it's nice getting a letter that your loved one has actually hand written. But I think MotoMail is a great way to stay in touch and to pass on important information.

If you have friends or family deployed (and in the Marines) I recommend you give it a shot.

Communication is the key to a great relationship. No matter how far the distance.

Wordless Wednesday ~ First Week Of March

Getting Creative ~ A "Snappy" Guestbook

It's all about being creative. I mean I have plenty of time to plan for this wedding. Marine will be deployed for 7 to 8 months I have plenty of time on my hands to think of creative things for our wedding.

Today's topic is Guest Books. Now let's be honest with ourselves. What is the real purpose of a Guest Book?

Is so that you know who all attended your special day?

Was it just created so that the friend that didn't quite make the bridesmaid list can have a special job so that she will feel needed and included?

Either way it has some how become a wedding must.

I have decided that I want to do something creative and less traditional than just a book. I want something that Marine and I will actually enjoy and not just stuff somewhere to collect dust.

While searching for alternative ideas I stumbled upon a photo guest book. You use a Polaroid camera and then someone will take pictures of the guests, quickly place it in the album and then the guest can write a special message next to their names. What a wonderful idea!!! And better yet I know that I have a dated (but still functioning) Polaroid camera packed up somewhere.

All I will have to buy is the film, a nice pen or marker for guests to sign with and the book itself..... now what kinda book to get...... maybe I'll have to do some more searching.

And I have two friends in mind that will be perfect to operate the guest book table.

I think it will be cute, and something Marine and I can display on our coffee table or anywhere else you would a regular photo album.

I think this is a great idea! I have three friends getting married this year, all of which will be be having more extravagant weddings than Marine and I can afford. Which is fine, with little creative ideas like this I think it will help jazz ours up and make it memorable.

The Rabbit

E, "Guess what!?!?!?! Marine got me a rabbit!"

Giggles, "The vibrator?"

E, "....... no a real rabbit....."

So remember I told you we went in the pet store? We went in to waste time. Simple as that.


Marine and I are both animal people. And ever since the disappearance of my beloved Hyper I have not wanted another dog. The past few months Marine has dropped hints about getting me a puppy. But each time I tell him I want to wait till he gets out and we are living together. That way his German Shepard and the puppy can get used to each other and we can all be settled in together. It's easier to introduce a puppy into a new home versus bringing in two adult dogs and expecting them to get along.


I digress.


We are in the pet store and what do we see.... cute.... little.... dwarf rabbits.


You see where this is going.


Marine and I had both had rabbits as kids but we had not planned on getting another one anytime in the near future. We look at them. I oh and ah and tell him how much the one looks like the first rabbit I had as a child. It is the only solid one in the group of spotted bunnies.


"Let's get it," Marine says with a grin.


"No, we don't need a rabbit." I laugh and we continue about the store.

************

The next morning we are at Cracker Barrel and Marine whispers to me, "We still have time to go get the rabbit before I have to be back at base."

I smile, "They aren't open yet."

He looks at me surprised and his face breaks out into a smile, "Well what time do they open?"

"10," I say matter of factly as I take a sip of my Dr. Pepper.

"Perfect."

So we leave Cracker Barrel and head back to the pet store. I know we don't need a rabbit. But Marine seems so excited that we are getting a pet of "our" own. And she is just so darn cute!

As we ride back to base I carefully take her out of her box and hold her in my lap. We discuss names. Tossing ideas back and forth.

"You said you were going to buy a Harley before you deployed," I point out jokingly.

"Hahah," He nods his head laughing at my obvious joke, "Your right."

We still don't decide on a name. As we stood out in the yard he asks again what I'm going to name her.

"I don't know."

"Name her Harley that way at least I can tell my buddies I bought a Harley before I left."

So meet Harley.

Marine's gift and shot at keeping me busy while he's gone.

Also Marine's not stupid. 'Buy her a rabbit and maybe she won't cry as much.'

Not a bad move on his part.

The Final Days Up Until D-Day

So much happened last week I'm not even really sure how to recap. It's all a blur.

Last week I lived the life of a Marine.... well not really..... but I did get up at 5 a.m. every morning and I did take showers in Marine's barracks room. Plus I helped pack his bags and helped the guys clean the room for inspection ---- so thats gotta count for something - right? Semper Fi!



Wednesday night we went out to eat seafood with Marine's family. His mom, sister and grandparents had come up for deployment.

Thursday was much of the same. Work for Marine, last minute things. The afternoon we went and explored the downtown seaside with the family and went to an afternoon movie.


We went to see Cop Out ~ Gotta love Bruce Willis. It was a decent movie. Funny, fast paced, yada yada yada. But seriously every other word was a curse word. I may not have noticed this but given the group that was with me. Imagine seeing this movie with your finances family.... mom, sister, grandparents...... oh and did I mention that Gramps is a preacher? Yeah. At one point Marine is looking me at me shaking his head in total and utter embarrassment.



We would glance down the aisle every once in awhile and thankfully Grandpa was laughing at some of the more G-rated jokes. But neither of us dared to look as the F-bombs were flying everywhere.


In true Southern fashion no one mentioned the movie again the entire week. Us southerners prefer to ignore the pink elephant in the room and just continue on as if it never happened.


Thursday evening Marine's dad arrived in town so before we went to eat diner with him we ran to Wal-Mart for a few last minute items in preparation for what Marine had termed "his 7 month guys trip". Guess that's one way to look at it.



There was a pet store next to Wal-Mart. We had time to waste so we entered and looked all the cute animals. More on this little stop later....


Friday was what I have coined in my mind as D-Day (deployment day).

We slept in, what little we could, and then headed to eat breakfast with the Family and Roommate at Cracker Barrel.


Marine had to be back at base and have his stuff out in the yard at 12.


Then the waiting game began.... we waited and waited and waited. Which was fine by me. I wasn't really ready for him to leave anyway.


But the time came. Everyone gathered around and a prayer was spoken and a few last words. Then they were off to the buses they would take them onto the next destination point of their journey.

I had read the articles.


Went over this moment a thousand times in head.

But nothing could prepare me for the emotions that swept over me that day.


I had promised I wouldn't cry. Which I didn't think would be a hard promise to keep. I'm not a public cryer. I just don't do it. Not that I'm a cold person or anything - I just don't cry in front of people..... On most occasions..... This was apparently not one of those occasions.

I cried.


Not loud or obnoxious sobs. But silent tears that ran down my face as I tried to wipe them away with the back of my hand.

Selfishly I looked around and saw husbands and wifes or girlfriends and boyfriends and wished that Marine and I had a few moments just to ourself. To share those last words you just can't say with everyone watching.

But the feeling quickly passed as I realized many of the guys did not have anyone there to see them off. I was thankful Marine's family was able to come and I was thankful that I was allowed to be a part of this special moment.

With his pack upon his back and his gun secured across his chest that he supported with one arm, he wrapped the other arm around me and gave me a tight hug. "I love you" he whispered in my ear one last time. A parting kiss and he pulled away to turn and make his way to the bus.

As he walked away it really hit me.

The sadness, the sorrow, the fear of the unknown.

But as quickly as it hit the storm was gone and the positive feelings once again soothed me ~ 8 months really isn't that long and in the end this can only make us closer.


As the bus pulled away another tear slid down my cheek. A felt as if my heart was no longer in my chest but on that bus.....




"You may as well give in, he is your long distance lover that you want to spend the rest of your life with. He is your steel-eyed, soft hearted, warm smiling, blank minded, hyperactive, overreacting , curious, passive, talented, spontaneous, physically fit, good looking, good for nothing, bundle of worry."

~ Marine Love, Author Unknown ~

Time Flies When Your With The One You Love

The Date: Friday February 26th.

The Time: Late

I arrived on base and Marine and I headed to our beach lodge. We laughed at the small size, some things just always look larger online. Nothing could put a damper on our good moods though.

Saturday we awoke early and headed out to explore. We went to the next town north and explored the downtown streets that ran along the water. We ate a waterfront restaurant that I couldn't even tell you the name of, the open sign and the wonderful smell wafting down the street was all that was needed to draw us in. The crab dip appetizer was amazing along with the rest of our lunch.

After lunch we continued to walk around enjoying being tourists and not being in a rush. So much history in these southern waterfront towns. Old buildings all with plaques out front telling the story and history of the building.

We also saw a duck and a cat either enjoying each others company or having a stare down.... either way I had to take a picture. Because really how often do you see something like this?

After our downtown adventure we went to the local aquarium where we saw fish, fish, more fish, sharks, and baby sea turtles. It was a great afternoon. And an overall nice relaxing day.

That evening we met up with Roommate and Roommates wife and went to see Shutter Island. Weird movie. At first I wasn't sure I really liked it but on the ride back to the lodge Marine and I discussed the movie and the different twists, turns and "what ifs". The discussion made me like the movie better I think. I liked analyzing the different possibilities. I like movies that make you think.

Sunday was our lazy day. We literally did not get out of bed till after 2 p.m. -- which is so not like us!! Normally we are up and out the door by 9 at least, especially on a pretty day. But not today. I got up at 10 and took a shower. Marine was still in bed so I crawled back in and curled up next to him and drifted back off to sleep.

After being sick for the past couple of weeks, were were both finally feeling better. The sleep helped though and was very much needed!

Eventually we dragged ourselves out of bed and I made Marine take me down to the beach. Did I mention our lodge was right on the water? So pretty!!

I set up the tripod and made Marine pose with me for pictures and he also probably started regretting the fact they he ever gave me the tripod.

Either way we laughed and had fun as spent time on the beach. The sun was warm but the breeze was cool. A tease that Spring was soon to come. We walked along looking for sharks teeth. Rumor was they were easy to find on this beach.

As we walked I said I never found a sand dollar before. Two steps later Marine starts laughing. Right in front of us is a perfect Sand Dollar.

I mean really what are the odds??!

That evening we went to diner with Roommate and Roommate Wife. Then we headed back to the room for a game of cards and some drinks of course. The guys wanted to teach us how to play spades. We played a few games but Crown and Dr. Pepper + trying to learn a new card game = no such luck.

So we played a game of Battle of the Sexes. Of course Roommate Wife and I won! I mean really were there ever any doubts?!

Then we started playing P&A (president's and assholes) my all time favorite drinking game. We had so much fun.

Perhaps to much fun. When the alarm sounded the next morning (Monday) at 4:50 a.m. I still felt slightly intoxicated. Marine drug himself out of bed leaving me to sleep for another hour. This would be my last day of the week to sleep in, if you can call sleeping till six a.m. sleeping in.

We spent the morning tying up loose ends and adding me to mailing lists and signing me up for Marine Corps newsletters that I wanted to get while he's away.

Tuesday Marine had a surprise scheduled for us. Marine always seems to have some kind of surprise up his sleeve. Couple's Massages ~ Oh so wonderful!! And what a great surprise.

Deep tissue massage - perhaps the most enjoyable pain I have ever experienced.

Marine's family also arrived Tuesday along with Marine1's. So we all met for diner of sushi and Hibachi.

The week was already half way over. Time was going by to fast. But time always seems to fly when your with the one you love and having fun.

More to come....

Final Goodbyes

Nothing could prepare me for this moment. For this day. Saying goodbye has never been so hard....

Temptation ~ A Glance Back At The 'Big' Days Of My Life

So I was flipping thru old post that were labeled as draft. Stuff I never saw fit to publish... And I came across a draft from 8/13/08 that just contained this quote:

Mary Alice: "Temptation comes to all of us. Whether or not we succumb depends on our ability to recognize its disguise. Sometimes it arrives in the form of an old flame, flickering back to life. Or a new friend who could end up being so much more. Or a young child who awakens feelings we didn't know we had. And so we give in to temptation, all the while knowing come morning, we'll have to suffer the consequences." (Desperate Housewives)

Temptation.

We've all given in to it at some point or other I'm sure. So I decided to examine the post I had published around this date. And fittingly I found this quote tucked among the Mr. Big Chapter of my life. Seriously, what was I thinking?!

I know what I was thinking. I wanted to be happy. And Big reminded me of a time in my life when I had been young, carefree, and happy. The 25 year old longed for that 16 year old girl happiness again.

Of course Big wasn't the answer. I knew that even then. But temptation.... awe sweet temptation ~ it was fun, it was living in the moment, it was laughing, it was not caring about the future. At that point in my life it was just what I needed. And believe it or not I'm grateful to Big for those stolen moments.

They make me appreciate what I have know with Marine so much more!

Mr. Big may have made that 16 year old girl happy all those years ago.... but he was no match for the 27 year old woman I've become.

Funny how life works out. Sometimes what you think you need.... well it is what you need...... but for different reasons than what you thought. I thought I needed Big at the time. And I did need him. I need his friendship to help me thru a dark point in my life. But I also needed him to later make me appreciate the man that would fill the shoes that Big just couldn't quite ever step in to.

Temptation.... it can come in so many forms. Attraction for the opposite sex or a lusting look at those shoes you know you shouldn't spend that much money on but just scream "BUY ME". Yes, temptation comes in many forms, how you handle it - perhaps that is what shapes you.

What is a temptation you have given into?

Lack Of Emotion

Originally written 12/3/09 after Obama's Troop Surge Speech

Last night Marine and I were talking on the phone and he says, "Oh I've been meaning to thank you."

Not recalling anything I have done in the past twenty-four hours that was thank-you worthy I ask, "Why's that?"

"Last night after Obama's speech you didn't panic, you didn't cry....... you were strong and supportive. Roommate and Roommate2 were on the phone with Girlfriend and Wife while I was on the phone with you and they were hysterical and freaking out. Wife said she had been crying all day. This didn't help Roommate or Roommate2 at all," he pauses, "It really made me appreciate you. I know its not easy but it made it so much easier on me that you weren't freaking out and all."

*************

Since that conversation I have been thinking about emotions and emotional strength. When I heard the speech I wanted to cry. But if I've learned nothing else over the years I've learned crying does not solve anything (side note: but I do understand that sometimes you just need to cry). I have been thru many hard times during my life and yes I have cried during them but that solved nothing and only left me feeling weak and out of control. Now I try to be strong and look for the best despite how bad it may appear.

At first when Marine told me about the other two girls I thought, 'should I have cried?' - 'does this mean I don't care as much as I thought I did?' - 'what's wrong with me?'. Then I realized that crying was not the factor here, yes I did care about Marine and that absolutely nothing was wrong with me. I was seeing the situation thru the eyes of an adult, not the eyes of a self-centered child that only considers themselves.

I knew when I started dating Marine that he had a 95% chance of deploying, it was all just a question of when. I know it will be harder on him as well as me than either one of us can possibly imagine. I mean he has deployed before but last time he was not in a relationship. I knew dating him would not always be easy but I decided it was worth it.

It's funny to reread this... I never would have guessed he was planning on proposing a few weeks after this :)